Braveheart Belles

Plug In Baby

Plug In Baby

We both wanted to recce the bottom half of the route but due to varying commitments, we couldn’t get a time to suit us both! 

Alison, completed it on Tuesday and agreed, it was tough emphasising the brutality of the Crow Road.

I had to wait until Thursday. Having had a few hours sleep, I woke just after 4am, did my usual faffing and headed through to Bannockburn about 5.30am.   I

parked up but didn’t make it out of the car. I suddenly felt unwell! I duly turned and came home! 

Ding, ding - round two. I headed back the next day. Let’s just say, I hope third time lucky prevails!

I took a Madaopar at 5am to kick start the fake dopamine replenishment; usual meds not due until 7am.  Started the route and just like that! Crash! Meds wore off! No gradual warning. It’s like someone pulling the plug out! Instantly depleted of energy; physically, cognitively and I can’t speak! (Although, some would say that’s a bonus!) When the meds work, it’s great but the unpredictability of whether I can ‘function’ or ‘not-function’ is a stressor!

I wish I could explain what it feels like but I’ve yet to assemble the adjectives in the right order. All I can say is that the feeling of vulnerability is the worst. 

Anyhoo, I took meds and waited at the side of the road. Up until then, I hadn’t switched the ‘magic’ button on! I got back on the bike, and although, still not fully functioning that button got pressed. But it’s still so hard. You still need to push down on those pedals! Snails were passing me! As I slowly, closed the distance between me and the top of the hill, I began to feel more human! Then I felt: ‘thud, thud, thud.’ FFS back tyre was completely flat! I ride tubeless. The sealant was spewing out the rim and my pathetic little pump was as useful as a chocolate loo teapot.  Although, only 3.5 miles into the journey my enthusiasm was now gone. TAXI!

I’ve concluded I’m certainly not driving back through for a third attempt! Fingers crossed the stars are aligned on ‘the’ day.

When I got home the tyre postmortem showed the cut in the tyre was too big for sealant and needed plugged.

Yesterday, was KCC club run day and desperate to get distance in,  I cycled to the meeting point - 25 miles. It was a ‘wing’ it day! I didn’t plot a route or register how many miles the club run was for! I guesstimated my day would be about 65 ish miles. It was 80! After experiencing another 

damn flat and after plugging it again, a passing cyclist managed to inflate it enough to get home.

So, on a positive note, it’s made me think… perhaps I could complete it after all. I’ve got so many things to be grateful for and that’s what I’ll be thinking about, along with my friend Gillian, when I’m pushing those pedals. 

As for Alison, well what can I say. She’s incredible and the progress she has made is phenomenal. She’s going to smash it. 

The Final Curtain

Alison hit the nail on the head… “training for our challenge has taken the joy out of our cycling.” There’s pressure to follow a plan and raise money, repeatedly sharing the link and asking for donations and trying to keep up to date with blogs and progress. Jings! My last blog didn’t have suck the life out ye’ all! Sorry about that!

I’ve missed my cycling buddy the last couple of weeks but hopefully we can get out together soon.

I had to rest up due to my damn back but I now have a toolbox of exercises to do. In general, I lost my cycling mojo! Primarily, because how I’m feeling, physically and mentally about the impending ‘extremely hilly’ route! 

I know you may be thinking, ‘Ocht! 100 miles is easy for Janet, she’s done it before, so no big deal.’ And normally, I would agree but, on this occasion, I can’t shake ‘dread.’ There’s been a shift (in my health and wellbeing). Quite quick, I would say. It’s hard to put my finger on it. There’s enhanced pain, unpredictability of meds wearing off and that experience of freezing!  Everything is so much harder, even compared to four weeks ago! It’s frustrating, scary and I’m finding it hard to deal with. In retrospect, although not diagnosed until aged 46, I had symptoms from aged 40. I’ve had this condition for 17 years. I have fought hard against Parkinson’s through exercise, which is proven to slow progression, but I just feel everything is catching up on me now. I’m trying to focus on what I can do, not what I can’t but finding that tough too. 

Behind on my training plan, on Sunday I did 54 miles, which I found tough. I thought, ‘jings, could I do the same number of miles again today, thinking about the 100 miler in four weeks time?’ Probably not, but I have a few more weeks of training to do and let’s just see how it goes!  It’s just too damn hard these days. So I’ve made a decision:  this will be my last epic fundraiser which involves such endurance. There’s less demanding ways to fundraise! And if I ever fancy doing a 100 miles it will be on my terms; not having to be at a cut off point by a certain time, etc. But at the of the day, this is my choice. I have to remember, the reason I’m doing this - for everyone affected by this condition and my bestie, Gillian. 

I just want to thank everyone for your sponsorship, past and present and words of support. Love and hugs to my husband Gary, my number one fan, who makes my life easier! 

Alison, you are a literal ray of sunshine. You intuitively know the right thing to say to lift me up.  The hard work and dedication you have invested to train for this challenge has been remarkable. Thank you for supporting my charity and I can’t wait to see 100 miles registering on your Strava!

Pity Party… for one!

PITY PARTY… FOR ONE.

I’m always praised on my positivity and more recently how well I’m looking for which I duly reply, “aww thanks, I’m doing good and feel great.” Internally, I want to scream, “I wish you could see my pain and how hard movement is, or even worse, when my medication wears off!”

It made me realise that I’m a very good actress. I wear a mask that shields the world of how I’m truly feeling. Well now, its ripped off for all to see. I don’t usually parade my pain but here it is folks. I’m hurting. The pain, so ferocious, I could vomit! 

Pain was one of my first Parkinson’s symptoms; a symptom that not everyone gets but something I’ve learned to live with but in addition a MRI concluded I have several bulging discs in my lower back (I reckon self inflicted with gardening). That along with the pain still felt in my cankle and spinal stenosis in my upper back isn’t making a Jolly Janet.

This has knocked my training out the window this week. I was due to ride lead on Saturday but I’ve pulled out of that. I’m currently seeking advice from a miracle physio. I’ve had to resign myself to the fact that my participation is seriously under threat. I’m worried and scared about that. I’m pretty stubborn (some may say stupid) when it comes to things like this and I know deep down I will give it a go but I may have to consider a plan B - I’m not sure what that looks like yet! 

Parkinson’s can add insult to injury! On Sunday, Gary and I came home and I went to save my flattened, wind hammered, sunflowers. There’s a patch of garden at the side of the house, where out of the abyss two beautiful rose bushes have arisen but the thorns on those beasts are lethal. After navigating my way through the thorns to get to the sunflowers, I soon realised that I didn’t have the strength to push the stick through the bark mulch. Also, my attempts at tying a knot, with string too long for the task in hand, was equally a failure; my hands didn’t have the dexterity or strength. The inevitable happened - my ‘go’ button switched to ‘off’ and I mean ‘off’ completely.  I felt my chest tighten, my voice lock-down, preventing me from shouting out and I couldn’t move.  My feet were concreted to the soft, bouncy texture of the barked area.  I have experienced this before but usually when I’m in a state of stress but on this occasion - no stress!! This is the PD symptom of ‘freezing?’ Cutting a long story short I was ‘stuck’ for 45 minutes, however, I’m grateful it wasn’t raining. Note to self - remember your phone!

False Memories… or is it?

False Memories… or is it?

I can’t express enough, how I feel about doing this route.  When I describe my previous experience with the words: ‘dread’ and ‘traumatised’ I think that says it all! But I need to change my mindset.  2019 was a pretty full on year with regards to my 50in50@50 challenge - a year long challenge that I created to pull me out of the darkness and raise funds for PUK, so in summary I was pretty tired.  So, are my memories false. Are them thar hills as bad as I remember? Well, I’ll find out tomorrow as Alison and I are heading that way to recce the harder part of the route! Wish us luck.

We’re doing this for Parkinson’s research and my main motivation is my bestie, Gillian, who is really struggling with this horrible condition and recently sustained a nasty head injury.

Flasks and false finishes.

Yesterday, Alison was keen to do a 40-50 miler but the weather forecast scuppered plans, opting for the indoor option instead. Alison has recently joined the Zwift platform where our avatars cycle along together! 

Admittedly, the thought of cycling that distance, indoors, didn’t fill me with joy and I wondered if I should mention this to Alison! I didn’t. I felt it was something she had to experience! My set up is at home, whilst Alison connects via the Wattbike at the gym. 

Unfortunately, due to the internet dropping, after 18 miles, I climbed off the bike, voicing every ache and pain. I had just asked Alison if she needed a saddle break and presumed that was the reason I couldn’t see her, thinking she nipped to the loo and perhaps downing a snack. Twenty minutes had passed before we connected again!  I had been sitting at the side of my bike whilst unbeknown to me, Alison was still pedalling away.  She was now on her 23rd mile. By this time I had cooled down and decided to call it a day! Alison completed a whopping 32 miles, whilst I tucked into coffee and traybake.

We’ve concluded that we’ll use Zwift for interval training and shorter rides. And in case you’re wondering … yes, I actually took a flask of coffee out on my indoor cycle! I highly recommend it.  

Victory or Vomit

Victory or Vomit!

Mindset is a wonderful tool and, based on past experience, making challenges public, makes me accountable especially when the kindness of family, friends and strangers is invested in donations and sponsorship for which I will be forever grateful. 

‘Vomit’ may sound like a harsh word but it truly describes the dread I’m feeling for this route!

But I have to keep reminding myself why I’m doing it… for Gillian and everyone affected by Parkinson’s. 

Currently, I’m overweight, not feeling my best and awaiting MRI results re. my back. Mornings are not great these days and it takes a while to get going! 

So today is Day 1 - Weight to shift, training and nutrition to nail and strength and stamina to build. On a mission to change this vomit mindset to victory!  

Why we are fundraising for Parkinson's UK

Thank you for visiting our fundraising page! We're taking part in Pedal Trossachs for Parkinson’s UK and would appreciate your support!

Janet:

In June 2016 I was diagnosed with Parkinson’s.  I embarked heavily on an exercise regime as, although medication helps with daily living, research shows that the only thing that slows progression is…EXERCISE.  For me, cycling, is my happy place - giving me freedom and independence.

It has it challenges: medication wearing off, attacks of dystonia in my feet and hands, right side weakness and due to breaking my ankle (now adorned with a plate and eleven screws) the ankle collapses and my foot constantly tries to slip out my shoe.

My friends are used to me cycling but what they can’t see is how hard it is; mentally and physically.  Having done this route before, in 2019, I’m still traumatised! I mean, those hills from the 75 mile mark and not forgetting the puncture going up the Crow Road, in the pouring rain! I’m sure I was last over the line and vowed…never again, but here I am!

So why am I doing it again? My PD and cycling touring buddy, Gillian, is having a hard time just now and the medication isn’t working well for her.  She’s started falling and her most recent fall resulted in a horrible head injury and fractured skull. I’m heartbroken but she’s a fighter and determined to bounce back - she is my motivation and I am dedicating this ride to her.

I am grateful that I can still get on a bike and I am so grateful to be doing this challenge with my amazing friend, Alison.  

Alison:

Alison - I’m cycling Pedal Trossachs with my cycling buddy and mentor, Janet.  I never think about Janet having PD when I cycle with her but I know that’s because she does a lot of work behind the scenes, e.g., fine tuning her medication and using her ‘rescue’ medication when she begins to switch off and is struggling.

Janet helped me train and cycle a very flat 96 miles last year, so we decided to take on this 100 mile extremely hilly challenge to raise money to support the work of Parkinson’s UK in Scotland.

This is going to be my most physically and mentally demanding challenging to date, however, the possibility of finding a cure is powerful motivation to train and hopefully complete the route.

Please help by sponsoring our cycling challenge. All the money raised will go towards ground-breaking research and life-changing support for the Parkinson's community.